Rodney "Sticky Fingers" Barnes Up To His Old Tricks

NEW SMYRNA BEACH, Fla. (AP) –  A Florida high school football coach has been arrested after authorities say he repeatedly stole money from students' wallets.Volusia County sheriff's officials said they used invisible luminescent powder sprinkled on decoy money to catch Rodney Barnes. Authorities said nine students lost $950, but they expect those numbers to rise as the investigation continues.
After several thefts in the boys' locker room, the school bought an ultraviolet theft detection kit and the sheriff's office launched "Operation Sticky Fingers." A student was given a wallet containing $141 and each bill was coated with luminescent powder. After some of the money was taken, officials search students for traces of the powder.Forty-three year-old Barnes admitted taking the money and confessed to several other thefts. He was charged Monday with burglary and grand theft.

I'm 100% convinced that the Voluisa County sheriff's office and the school administrators who lead this investigation named this "Operation Sticky Fingers" because that's Rodney Barnes' nickname. You can think all you want that "sticky fingers" is just a clever way of saying "thief" but you'd be so wrong. Look at that guy in the face and tell me that he doesn't eat 5-7 honey-buns per day and walk around getting his sticky ass fingers on everything. That's what I thought. 

I love how the story only refers to Rodney Sticky Fingers as "a Florida high school football coach". For whatever reason, it gives off the impression that he's the head coach or something - but if you played sports growing up, you know exactly what kind of coach Sticky Fingers is. Every town in America has a guy like this - just an old creepy dude who cares WAY too much about high school sports. Year after year, they find some way to finagle their way onto a coaching staff with some bootleg role like assistant linebackers coach or some shit. They try so hard to fit in with the players that it makes everyone around super uncomfortable. Needless to say these bros typically aren't raking in the cash since they spend the majority of their time obsessing over high school sports, trying to fill some childhood void since they probably definitely sucked at sports, so I kinda feel bad for Sticky Fingers here, guys just trying to get by. If I had to guess, I'd say that all of that money went to gas, 6 packs, 7/11 hot dogs, and entry fees to other high school football games so that he could get a good scouting report for future games.