Real Life Wizard of Oz Type Shit Like You Read About

New York Magazine - Remember balloon boy? This is almost like that, but reportedly real and thus terrifying: An inflatable bounce house, a.k.a. a bounce castle, flew 50 feet into the air in upstate New York yesterday, seriously injuring two children. Three kids were inside at the time, the South Glens Falls Post-Star reports, but fell out when the unstable structure was about 15 feet high. "It was like a horror movie," said a witness. "It just kept going up and up. It cleared our building and the trees." Above, apparently, is a photo of the bounce house floating away.

WNYT Albany reports:

The three kids, ages 5, 6, and 10, fell out of the toy. The two boys were seriously injured. The girl suffered minor scrapes and bruises

Parents say one boy landed on a parked car, the other landed on asphalt.

The Little Tikes–brand bounce house was about ten-by-ten feet and reportedly staked into the ground, according to the Post-Star, but could not be held down. "My older daughters witnessed it and said it was just horrible," said the mother of one of the children. "A big gust of wind just blew it right off the ground with the kids in it. It's just sickening." Sorry, kids, no more bounce houses.

Kid died in a flying moon bounce accident. What an IDIOT! The kids are flying, honey, take a good picture! Ahh, they're dead! 

Seriously, how big of jackass is this parent. You had one job, guy. Stake down the moon bounce so a large gust of wind doesn't come and Wizard of Oz this bitch all the way to Neverland, and you failed. This report says the house was only 50 feet in the air, but this article must've been written by the parent because that is the biggest understatement since God told Noah it was going to rain a little bit. Look at that picture, that moon bounce looks like a fucking doll house. There's 0 chance that thing is anything less an 200 feet in the air. 

I'm honestly just upset there isn't a video or a Vine of this:

Kids having fun, laughing and bouncing - whoooooosh! Wind comes through and just scoops up the house like a leaf on a windy day (crazy similes, take notes). Kids are screaming, parents are shouting, one by one kids are dropping out of this thing on top of cars and just flat-fuck bouncing off the asphalt. Then the moon bounce just disappears into the atmosphere. 

Ab-fucking-surd. I don't know who's getting sued here - the parents for negligence, the moon bounce company for product malfunction, or word on the street is, Al Gore is suing the republicans for filibustering all environmental bills in the House and Senate because this is undoubtedly a result of global warming. Whatever happens, one thing is for sure, these kids are scared for life. Being swept up by Mother Nature and dumped back out to the Earth like a pair of dice makes it pretty difficult to discount all the normal bad shit that can happen to you on a day-to-day basis. Good luck getting that kid to leave the house again. 

PS - If I'm swept up in a flying moon bounce, I'm hanging on for dear life and just riding that bitch out. Aside from having a parachute, the only thing making a 200 foot free fall anymore comfortable is landing in a moon bounce. Can't believe that 5 year old didn't think of that.