Saturday, April 26, 2014

Is ESPN Kidding Me With This Michael Phelps Coverage?




Associated Press
MESA, Ariz. -- Michael Phelps' comeback meet was cut short Friday when he failed to advance to the 50-meter freestyle final. The 18-time Olympic gold medalist used the morning preliminaries at the Arena Grand Prixto fine-tune his butterfly stroke instead of doing freestyle like everyone else. He finished seventh in a time of 24.06 seconds, missing out on the eight-man evening final. Phelps didn't even make any of the three consolation finals because he was 42nd overall; only the top 32 qualify for those, so his first competition since retiring after the 2012 London Olympics ended early. "I don't think there will be enough scratches," coach Bob Bowman joked about the possibility of Phelps getting into any of the finals. Phelps ended up in the sprint because none of the day's other events -- 400 individual medley, 200 freestyle and 200 backstroke -- are ones that he plans to compete in during this comeback. He dominated the 400 IM during the height of career, but he vows he won't swim the grueling event anymore. "I'm putting that out there: I am never swimming the 400 IM again," he said. Bowman jabbed him, saying, "Kind of like, `I will never swim again." At that, the longtime friends laughed. Phelps had insisted he was done with swimming after London and frequently pointed out he had no intention of swimming past the age of 30. He turns 29 next month, and would be 31 by the time of the 2016 Rio Olympics. Phelps tread lightly when pressed about his intentions toward a possible fifth Olympics. He was 15 at his first games in Sydney in 2000, when he was the youngest member of the entire U.S. team. He didn't medal, but went on to haul in 22 medals over his next four games, including a record eight gold in 2008. He repeatedly emphasized he's having fun this time around and feels more relaxed than ever. "I felt like a kid and that was the coolest part about it," he said. "It's a good starting point, being able to get some races back under my belt." Phelps' goal Friday was to take just three breaths in the one-lap race; easy enough for a sprinter but not for a swimmer who specialized in distances ranging from 200 to 400 meters during his career. "It's weird for me not to breathe," he said. "I'm used to breathing every single stroke." He gulped air every second or third stroke, and halfway through he took two consecutive breaths. "As soon as I did that, I was like, `Man, I wonder if I can hold my breath the whole way," he said. "I was like, `No, I don't think so, so I snuck one more at 15." Afterward, Bowman told him, "You don't really know how to swim a 50." Phelps replied, "I guess that's a good thing." He finished second to Ryan Lochte in the 100 butterfly on Thursday, tying the fourth-fastest time in the world this year. Next up for Phelps is high-altitude training in Colorado next month. He's entered in Grand Prix meets in North Carolina and California, although his presence hasn't been confirmed yet.

I get that Michael Phelps "coming out of retirement" is a big story. He's the most decorated Olympian of all time and even though the majority of sports fans are skeptical that he was ever really retired, you can understand why the media would give this story so much run. What I'm taking issue with is the continued media coverage this is getting. If ESPN wants to yap bout Phelps ending his retirement for a week straight, I can live with that. But don't start giving us updates on how he fares in these stupid ass swim competitions that literally no one has ever heard of before.

I'll tell you when Americans will pay attention and care about how Michael Phelps does in a race; August 5-21, 2016 when he's swimming in the Rio de Janeiro Summer Olympics. So lets not pretend that anyone gives a shit if he finishes 42nd overall in the butterfly race at some pool in Arizona 2+ YEARS BEFORE THE GAMES.

The best part about this story too is that no one can relate to it. The part where he's talking about holding his breath for a certain amount of strokes, I had know idea what was going on. And to be honest with you, I felt really weird when I finished reading the paragraph - that doesn't even make sense! And yet it happened.

So I hope Michael Phelps swims in all these competitions that don't mean anything, practices at high altitudes for 8 hours straight, eats 7,000 calories from IHOP every day; But I think I speak for literally everybody when I say we just don't want to hear about it until 3 August's from now.


PS - All I could think of when writing this was this girl swimmer I went to high school with who went on a social media rampage circa 2012 when she was bragging about how she was a fan of Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte long before they were famous and decorated Olympians. To this day I'm so confused by the tirade, like ok, so you watched SWIMMING on TV and read SWIMMING articles before other people did? Uhh cool? Good job..? Beyond weird.


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